Funny letters to British Punk Legends regarding their songs, all written during the 2020 Lockdown, with genuine responses from the actual artists. Includes Bonus Hidden Tracks revealed upon Download!!

All of these tracks are voiced by the authors and the artists. As with the high quality paperback version with full colour graphics, a donation will be made to charity from the profits of every book & individual track sold, as a thank you to the artists involved and the punk community. 

Press Reviews“I found myself thinking, 'just one more',as I turned the page and lost hours as a result” Louder Than War

“..a book filled with punk rock royalty.. every letter written is filled with references to the lyrics of songs by each band.. it's an A-Z of letters that would put Victor Meldrew to shame” Devolution Magazine

“Ban this book NOW! It's entirely far too silly. Buy a copy then burn it!!” Punktuation! Magazine

“Deep in to it when you get a spare minute and pretty much guarantee a giggle every time” Moshville Times

“It's all gloriously silly stuff,this time with punk attitude” Uber Rock

“..page after page of punk rock craziness via sixty six of the most surreal letters you are ever going to read” RPM Online


Testimonials from 'Punk Royalty'

“Half-baked questions to half-pissed lyricists about half-dumb songs – what’s not to halflike?” Graeme Douglas, Eddie and the Hot Rods

“A work of waggish wonder that somehow finds the ‘yarn’ in ‘pedantry’” Garry Bushell, The Gonads

''Another essential publication from the House Of Phillpott, as equally inspirational and disturbing as all their other literary efforts'' Leigh Heggarty, Ruts DC

''A magnificent pot pourri of the sort of questions you've always wanted to ask but were too sensible to do so'' Max Splodge

''Many thanks for including me in your scurrilous book'' Jon Langford, The Mekons

“I now know my fellow musicians and friends are Cranked Up really crazy!” Wayne Barrett, Slaughter and the Dogs

"A reet rivitin' read, hilarious rock 'n' roll lockdown madness... gee some of us must of been out of it when we wrote these" Mat Sargent, Chelsea

"In 1977 we wrote Insane Society because we thought society was insane. Today we know society is insane and this book proves it'' Noel Martin, Menace

“Never had this much fun being misunderstood” Dick, Subhumans

“It’s all lies!” John Robb, The Membranes

'Having read this book from cover-to-cover, soaking up the wit and wisdom shared by a selection of Punk Rocks' finest minds, I have concluded that I am the most wittiest and most wisdomest in Punk Rock right now.....'' Paul Rooney, Vice Squad

''Since reading this extraordinary book, my life has changed completely. I am now destitute and all my teeth have fallen out'' Martin Gordon

''The comedic japery of Lord Philpott's letters has put my attempts at merry moot in the written word firmly in the shadow, much to my chagrin'' Arturo Bassic

''As The Public School Punk Balladeer, it is an honour and a privilege to be co-opted into punk rock’s epistolary élite of officers and gentlepersons.'' Auntie Pus

''Finally the proof that punk rock wasn't so dumb after all – kinda'' Steve 'Cast Iron' Smith, Red Alert

''D Philpott reveals an understanding of Punk Rock so profound it makes Malcolm McLaren look like a Trouser Salesman!” Brian Damage, Nuffin'

''It’ll take more than 2 vaccinations to stop this literary pandemic'' Plague UK

''You chaps are truly bonkers!'' Eddie, The Vibrators

''Knock Knock....who’s there....letters...letters who?...letters in this book are the dogs boll***ks!'' The Pukes

"I thought I knew everything there was to know about our glorious punk rock; however, Grammar Free in the UK has shown me up for the nincompoop I am'' Chris Wheelie, Ruptured Ambitions.

''This had me spitting my coffee over my trousers and through my nose whilst choking and laughing at the same time!!'' Nick, English Dogs and Unholy Alliance

'''A ridiculously brilliant project - the responses speak volumes about the artistes.'' Jessi, Eastfield

“A unique and original concept, poking fun at punk rock bands and giving them the opportunity to poke back, truly a harpoon into the leviathan that is pomp, ceremony and ego; Melville would be proud!” Chris Bundie

''Some may find the mocking of my sacred texts amusing....My wife being one of them!'' Tony Wakeford, Crisis

''I went upstairs on a bus once. That was nothing compared to the excitement contained within these pages" Gareth Holder, The Shapes

''An eye splittingly loud volume of punk hyperbole basted with the creative juices of the blank generation!'' Tom Crossley, The Phobics

''This book deserves more than a smart-ass one-liner - Hell’s teeth, even an ocean liner wouldn’t do it justice!” Jonzip, The Zips

"Chuffed to be part of the most punk document since Joey Ramone's shopping list" Pete from Pete Bentham & the Dinner Ladies

''IT’S BEEN A PLEASURE TO HAVE BEEN INVOLVED IN THIS…..NOW CAN I GO BACK TO BED PLEASE” COLIN, GBH

I’d love a signed copy of this book.. only way I’ll get rid of it on. Ebay” Kev Nixon, anti-pasti “

"These people are a menace to the creative community and, in my opinion, should be put down. Please don't encourage them by buying this book" Duncan Reid

''Obviously, our legal representatives failed miserably to have all mentions of The WitchDoktors removed from this offensive publication. They have been shot and so should you be sir!'' Andy Last

''Only lockdown boredom could have made me write a letter back to these people'' Karen Amsden, Hagar The Womb

''This Philpott fellow is becoming a nuisance, I am a very busy man and frankly I Don’t Need it'' Brian Haddon, Eater

“THIS is how you spent Lockdown??” Argy Bary, Watford (who aren't in it)